Hamburgese Snogging Extravaganza
by silentdreamsinthisheartx
Summary: What if Dave's vati was going to the clown car convention too? Dave the Laugh and Gee in Hamburger a go go land? Bound to be some vair strange fandangos. Will bronching broncos push Gee closer to Dave? What about her Lurrvee God? Set during THAMBE.
1. Buddhist Teachings

A/N I don't own the characters or any parts of the story you recognise. I don't get any profits, I just write for the love of writing. :D

Well this is another idea that popped into my head when I was my wracking my brains on ideas for a new Georgia story, as the two I'm working on at the moment are nearly finished :(

First couple bits will be from the book- they will be in italics :D

Hope you like this :)

* * *

**_9:30am_**

_On our way to the airport of luuurve dreams. I am sooooo excited. I said to Jas, "I am going to call all the people who have the surname as Masimo as soon as we get to whatsitsname."_

_Jas said, "Memphis"_

_"Yes, that."_

**_In the depature lounge_**

**_11:00am_**

_I said to Jas, "Hamburger-a-gogo land, here we come! Brace yourselves for a knicker invasion!!!"_

Then a vair familiar voice said in a laugh-ish way:

"Ooh no Kittykat, its a pants and knicker invasion!"

Dave the Laugh?

Ohmygiddygodspyjamas!

What is he doing here?

He stood grinning like a fule at me and Jassy Spassy being shocked a gogs times a gazillion.

At least I am a shocked agog with make up and high heels on. Thank you Baby J.

Jas said, "What are you doing here Dave?"

"Bonsior to you to Jas. Well this super sexy and le cool Pantsmeister is here to go to the same clown car convention as Kittykat's vati."

"Why didn't you tell me when i last phoned you?"

"Because all you could talk about was your Italian Girlfriend, anyway I can't think of a better suprise than your Pantsmeister, Kittykat"

"So you are going to be in er..."

Jas said, "Memphis Georgia"

"Yeah that place."

"Well done Gee, yes i am, so while our vati's are brushing their beards and looning up the Hamburgese, we can spend our days together as a threesome. "

"Oo-er!"

"Mind out of the gutter Gee, I've told you before I don't do phone sex so i definietly don't do threesomes"

"What have threesomes got to do with phone sex, le petite ninicoompoop?"

"Everything Kittykat" Boys are le mystery.

Jas said,"But you just said we would be in a threesome Dave, so why would you not do threesomes that doesn't make sense?"

Good Budda, it is hard being the only smart one here.

"Jas I meant i don't do number 10'ing threesomes, I feel it cheapens things." Dave said, with a gorgey porgey and hint of yummy scrumboes grin.

Jazzy Spazzy, the ramblers queen blushed and said, "Oh...yeah i'm going to go see if Libbs is alright"

Ha. As if Libbs would let Jas look after her. She's probably off terrorising some other little toddler, or going on those scanner things that put luggage in the plane. Oh well, one less loon on the place is vair guht if you ask me.

**_1 second later_**

I have just realised one very important and scary bananas thing. I am alone with Dave.

Everytime I'm alone with Dave we normally end up doing a certain thing.

3 guesses pallie of the worlds.

And I can tell you now it does not include talking about nature like a certain couple i know.

Not that Dave and me are a couple.

We are not.

And i don't think about Dave that way.

Anyway before you silly chums of the world rudey dudely interrupted me, it's now just me and Dave the Laugh.

Merde.

**_1 minute later_**

"I know you are probably having ramblign sessions with your Loon Central brain of yours, but this whole silence fandango bores moi"

Ah merde. I must of been rambling to long.

"Sorry Dave, what was you saying?"

"About us introducing the Hamburgese to Pants and Knickers!"

"Ah yes, we will go down in history for making a most fabby discovery for the Hamburgese. They might even do a parade in our honour. Imagine how fabby my face would be on a baloon!"

"Ah but of course, both of our faces on baloons would be vair guht tourist attractions. What about Spazzy though?"

"Ah while we are educating the Hamburgese, she will be talking the way of the voles with Hunky"

"Hunky?"

Ah merde. I wasn't supposed to tell anyone about that.

Oh well, Radio Jas has spilled gazillions of my secrets.

"That's what she calls Tom, and he calls her Po"

Dave the Laugh just looked at me for a un momento then burst into a laughing spaz.

He looks so gorgey when he laughs.

Even though he looks a bit like a fool.

**_1 minute later_**

Dave is still having his laughing spaz.

Oh poo-osity and merde on top

A laughing spaz on my own is marching up to my mouth.

No! Stay down!

As usual it didn't listen to me.

Fabby. Now I am having a laughign spaz aswell.

The sort where my nose goes adoc.

Marvy.

**_5 minutes later_**

Me and Pantsmeister are still having laughing spaz's.

We look like escapeed loons from the Laughing Loons Insistiute

The security guard was looking at us like we were fules, which Dave is and I'm not.

For the love of panties i hope he doesn't arrest us.

Then Mutti would come over, all basooma adjusting and tutting.

That's enough to make anyone sick.

**_5 minutes later_**

Finally stopped laughing.

My poor stomachy.

I didn't realise that i was leaning on Dave until just now.

Merde.

As if he read my mind, which i reckon he can, Dave said:

"You just can't get enough of me can you?"

"Psh. More like you can't get enough of me Dave the Flirt"

"Dave the Flirt? That's what your loon of a brain comes up with?"

"Excuse me, don't insult my brain. It will get vair offended and explode."

"Sorry Gee's brain, will this help?" and he lent down and pecked my forehead.

I know it wasnt' a snog, but it still sent tingles down me.

It felt vair groovy gravy.

Dave had the pre snogging look in his eyes.

Merde.

I don't think I would be able to resist if he snogged me.

**_30 seconds later_**

For once Jas's spaceship arrived just on time.

She came all flicky fringing over and said:

"What where you two laughing like spazzes about?"

"Oh don't worry your vole filled head, Po" Dave said.

"Gee! You said you wouldn't tell anyone!"

"Sorry Po"

Me and Dave started laughing like loons again, while Jas just stood their in humpty mood while flicking her fringe.

**_1 minute later_**

Jas fringed off to suck up to my mutti while me and Dave where still laughing.

Dave said, "She looks like she's going to be in Strop Central with you"

"Yeah, but all it will take is a few midget jems and a new owl for her to forgive me"

"Aah that girl has her head in a badger hole i swear"

"Preety much moi petite fule."

"So I'm your petite fule am i?"

"No, my brain sent the wrong instant message to my lips."

"Aah I think your lips talked on their own Kittykat, and they tell the truth"

"Err no cause that would be like the pope dancing"

Dave just looked at me then said, "Are you mad?"

"No, you are!"

"NO, YOU ARE!"

"NO, YOU are!"

Then this awful thing happened.

Dave lips where on mine.

As much as he is vair tip top on the snoggosity front

This is supposed to be my Oversea Snog Fest with Masimo.

And I have betrayed him already.

Although he doesn't know he is going to be part of an Oversea Snog Fest.

So it's okay.

**_10 minutes later_**

Daves stopped snogging me, winked and said:

"Let the Hamburgese Snogging Extravaganza begin!" and moonwalked off to his parents.

Giddygodspyjamas!

His vati is like a clone of mine.

No wonder Dave is such a loon.

**_1 minute later_**

I went over to the Elderly Loons i.e. Mutti, Vati, Uncle Eddie and the Loons: Jas and Libbs.

Ew.

Uncle Eddie is doing stripper moves.

Erlack! No-one wants to see Elderly Porn at an airport!

Mutti said, "Georgia, stop galivanting around the airport"

Typico.

Her nunga-nungas can galivant all they want, but i'm not allowed to walk around.

Vair rudey dudey and selfishosity filled of her.

I will have such tragic memories of my childhood when I'm older.

**_On the plane_**

Fabby! Finally on the plane.

Hurry up and take meto my Lurrvee God.

**_1 minute later_**

Oh fabby! Not. I have to sit between Libbs and Jazz.

Libbs is not happy at having to wear a seatbelt.

She made her opinion clear to the airhostess.

When she hit her with it.

Needless to say the airhostess now hates us.

Baby J, why do you torture me like this?

**_10 minutes later_**

I just got comfortable in this vair horrible seat, when someone kicked my back.

Again.

And again.

Now Gee, remember your buddhist teachings.

Calmosity at all times.

**_1 minute later_**

Screw Buddist teachings. This little annoying twerp is going to get the pants knocked out of them.

I said while turning round, "Look you fule of a spoon, I am trying to do my beauty regime.."

I stopped half way through when I saw who it was.

Dave the Laugh.

"Hi Kittykat, did you enjoy the ride?"

"No you rudey dudey spoon, that hurt!"

"Aaw diddums, you should be vair happyosity that you got to ride my camel, besides who said a camel's ride would be easy?"

"Oo-er!" I said and started laughing.

Dave's vati just looked at me in admirosity.

"Your just as much if a loon as your vati"

How dare he! That is vair offensive.

"Ooh bad thing to say Vati, Gee will be vair offended"

"Stop calling me vati!"

"But you are my vati!"

"My names not vati"

"It's my special name for you"

I got bored and turned round letting them continue their argument.

**_1 second later_**

This is going to be one vair strange and longosity trip!

* * *

Well it was vair longer than i expected. Hope you liked it, let me know; review! :)

My fingers typed this on their own, so if it's no good blame them. Also sorry for any grammer and spelling mistakes i have proof read twice but i always seem to miss things :(

Remember in the wise words of Dave: Never eat anything bigger than your head.

Tatty bye! :)


	2. Embrace the Pants

**A/N As everyone knows I don't own the characters. ****Thank you for the fabby reviews of this, they made me vair happy :D. I loved writing the first chapter, it was so easy my fingers just typed on there own, hopefully that will happen again :D. **

* * *

**_1 minute later_**

Giddy god. You can't even do a simple face mask without people looking at you like your a loon.

Just because they don't like to enhance their natural beauty, doesn't mean they have to abuse me.

Besides what else are you supposed to do on a 11 hour flight?

And anyway my vati and his weird brother are flirting with air hostesses.

While wearing leather trousers.

And people look at me like I'm strange?

God grief. People are vair dim, if they think I'm a loon.

Plenty of people do face masks and put in hair rollers on an airplane

I must not be the only one with a international horn partner.

**_20 minutes later_**

Gott in himmel! Never put in hair rollers before you take off in a plane!

My head was pushed back, so I entered Ouch Central.

"Ouchy ouch, call the pope i may die"

"Oh Georgia, stop being so silly" Mutti tutted from across the aisle.

Erlack.

I almost forgot that there was a Nunga City that tutted and looked like a prozi on this plane.

I.e. my mutti for all the confuzzled minxes of the world.

God she looks like mutton dressed as lamb.

Does she honestly think a tiny leather tank top is appropriate for a woman of her age?

She should be wearing old loon clothes, doing the housework, cooking and staying out of my way.

Like Jas's mutti. She's a proper mutti unlike mine.

What chance have i got with a mutti like her?

I might aswell put myself in a convent already.

Well actually I'll do that after my OverSeas SnogFest with the Lurrvee God.

Hmm I wonder how far away Manhatten is from Memphis?

I bet it's a simple bus ride away.

**_10 minutes later_**

Why can't I come from a normal family?

Why did you have to give me these bunch of loons as a family?

Uncle Eggie as I fondly call him and Vati were showing me and Jas objects like a spoon and saying:

"Do not be afraid weird alien creature, this is a spoon"

Vair nice. Not. Just because I have a green face mask on and haircurlers doesn't mean I am a alien.

**_1 minute later_**

Haha got my own back on Vati by using my gigantibus amounts of cleverosity.

I got the spoon and chucked it at him.

His nose has gotten even bigger.

Tres amusante in my fabby opinion.

_**1 second later**_

"Great throw Kittykat, remind me to not piss you off when you have a spoon in your hand."

Ah merde. I forgot Dave was here. I lent over the top of my chair and Dave started pissing himself laughing.

What in the name of pantibus is he laughing at.

Oh yeah.

I have a green face mask on.

Great now I can hardly speak.

"Stop laughing you spoon!" I just about managed to say.

He kept laughing like a loon while his mutti just tutted at him.

Then he grinned at me and said:

"You suite the green faced fule look Kittykat"

"Thanks, I think"

"Go wash that mask off, I can't look at you without wanting to laugh"

"Well you are Dave the Laugh"

"Yes, but get on your camel girl and go!"

Vair loony.

**_10 minutes later_**

I finally got back to my seat after a gazillion years of trying to wash off my face mask.

Plus there was no towel to dry my face on, so I had to wait for it to dry.

Vair tedious, I'll tell you.

When I got back, Jazzy had moved next to my mutti and Libbs was torturing the captain with her fwiends Scuba Diving Barbie and Sandra.

God help us all.

**_1 minute later_**

That cheeky cat! Dave has layed across mine, Jas's and Libbs seats.

"Get off my seat you cheeky cat!"

"But Kittykat! This biscuit needs his beauty sleep"

"Do it on your own seat then!"

"Can't Mutti and Vati are asleep there"

"And?"

"Do you want me to catch their old loon disease?"

"Yes."

"That hurt Kittykat."

"Dave! Please move!"

"All you had to say was please" He said tutting at me.

God, if you counted the amount I got tutted at was money, I would be vair rich.

He got up and walked out into the aisle.

Thank you Baby J.

I sat down in Jas's space next to the window so I could try and see Hamburger a gogo land.

**_1 minute later_**

Cheeky cat!

Once I sat down, Dave walked over put his head on my lap and layed on the other two seats.

"Er Mr Laughy Man, what do you think you're doing?"

"Laying down" he said with his eyes closed.

"Why have you got your head on my lap?"

"Would you rather them on your nungas? Just embrace the Pants Kittykat"

Boys are so vair strange.

I couldn't be bothered to argue with him anymore, and ignored him to look out the window.

**_Half an hour later_**

Vair bored. All Dave is doing is sleeping.

How selfish is that?

Leaving me to ramble to myself.

Vair selfish if you didn't know

He looks vair cute when he is sleeping though.

No! Don't think that brain!

This trip is supposed to be about Masimo.

**_10 minutes later_**

Gott in himmel! Dave is talking in his sleep.

But what he is saying is vair sending me on a camel to shocked ville.

"I lurrvee you Sex Kitty"

Ohmygiddygodspyjamas!

Dave LURVES me?

Oh Baby J, why do you do this to me?

I'm going to feel tres awkward with him now.

If I didn't lurve the Lurve God, I would probably want to go out with him.

He is vair gorgey.

And funny.

And a laugh.

And understands my loon-ness.

No stop brain! You are not supposed to be thinking about Dave.

**_Touchdown_**

Dave finally woke up when the captain announced in a och land accent that we were starting our descent. Libbs came back and sat in between us.

She kept looking at me then Dave and saying:

"Naaiiccee"

She is such a loon. Nothing like me.

Dave looked at me, tres freaked out by Libby.

She was trying to make him "snoggle" Scuba Diving Barbie, and hit him around the head with her when he said no.

"Bad boy! Barbie lobes you!"

"You're the bad boy!"

"No you's are"

"You!"

"You!"

Fabby. Now I have to listen to Dave argue with my loon sister.

Baby J, please save me.

**_Memphis airport_**

Yeeeeeeeeeeees! Finally here!

Memphis, make way! The good people of Billy Shakespeare are here to educate you all!

Dave and his family got off with us, as his vati, my vati and Uncle Eddie have become bestest pallies.

Fabby.

Me and Jas did a triumphant inferno dance which Dave joined in with, adding his own Dave moves as he called it.

Good grief.

**_In our rental car_**

What sane person would let my vati drive?

Well it was a Hamburger a gogo chap so not very sane. (A/N no offense to American people, it's just what Gee's feelings towards Hamburgese people is like)

Especially as he was wearing a cowboy hat.

And had a moustache.

**_10 minutes later_**

Marvy. Now my vair sophis uncle and father are yelling howdy out the window.

I'm hoping someone arrests them.

See when i shout howdy its vair mature and sophis when they shout it its elderly loon-ish.

Gott in himmel. It's hard being the smartest person here.

**_Hotel - 5:00pm_**

Finally here after a gazillion years of Vati's driving, we finally hitched up at the hotel.

This is more like it.

Its vair big.

They even have someone who takes your luggage up for you.

Fab!

**_30 minutes later_**

Me and Jas have finally got to our room after being dragged by Mutti around the hotel, then we had to "save" Scuba Diving Barbie from the pool because Libbs was screaming vair loud.

As we were fiddling around with the key thing someone came up poked my sides.

I jumped like ten feet in the air.

I turned around to see Dave pissing himself laughing.

Oh fabby. Don't tell me he's staying in this hotel too?

"Jas, Gee say hello to your neighbour, me!"

"Dave, are you stalking me?"

"No Kittykat, you loon. My vati booked this hotel, because its where most of the people attending the convention are staying.

"Oh" Oh? That's the best you can come up with brain?

"Oh indeed. See ya tomorrow ladeez, remember bikinis are always the best thing to wear." He grinned and walked into his room which was down the hall from ours.

Fabby.

* * *

**_A/N I know not much happened in this chapter, but there should be more in the next one. I hope you liked it anyways :)_**


	3. Water Fights

_**A/n *gasps shocked* Has it really been nearly three weeks since I last updated? I have been losing track of time recently, I'm sorry for the long wait. I'm not sure where this chapter is going, so I'm going to let my fingers do the talking, well actually typing but you know what I mean. I hope. Anyway I hope you like this and please check out: Sex Kitty, I Luuurve You! written by me and Earth Kid Tree Hugger on our joint account: Dave the Laugh is GROOVY-GRAVY. Also check out our Pant Awards on the same account :) Also if you haven't, check out Earth Kid Tree Hugger's stories; they are amazing :D**_

_**10: am**_

Aaah. I lurvee being able to wake up without being hit with Mr Fish.

Or some other "fwiend" of Libbs.

The down side is Jas is fringing about the room.

Yelling at me to get up.

Jeez.

Even on holiday she is a stuffy owl.

_**5 minutes later**_

Jas actually started attacking me with an owl.

Who takes a toy owl on holiday?

Jas obviously.

She's such a violent vole these days.

She really is asking for a duffing up.

And because I am vair considerate and nice pallie I will give her one.

_**15 minutes later**_

Hahaha.

I duffed up Jas.

And ruined her fringe.

Which took her an hour to get her version of "perfect".

Now she's being all huffy.

Well at least she's not talking about nature crap.

Again.

**_1 minute later_**

Why did I invite her on holiday?

I should of asked Ro-Ro.

That would be vair and tres amusante.

And we would be introducing the Hamburgese to:

Knickers, pants and Vikings.

How fabby would that be?

Plus Ro-Ro wouldn't ramble about nature.

Or hit me with a toy owl.

Although she may hit me with her beard or horns.

_**20 minutes later**_

Hmm.

Slight problemo here.

Do you remember what Dave said about wearing a bikini?

Well I was going to wear a swimming costume as a strike against his rudey dudey mind.

But….

All I have are bikinis.

So now he is going to think I put it on for him.

Ho hum pigs bum.

_**30 minutes later**_

Jeez.

Jas is so selfish.

Her bestest pallie was having a crisis and what did she do?

Scream at me and drag me out of the door before I got to change into the bikini I wanted to wear instead of the one I was wearing.

Bad voley.

Her karma will get her soon.

_**Pool**_

So hotty wotty out here.

It would be vair guht if mutti wasn't sunbathing without her bikini top on.

Erlack!

Why does she think It's right to poke peoples eyes out with her bare nungas?

It's disgusting.

Plus vati keeps doing that twiddling things with her nip nips.

It's disgusting.

Plus Libbs is watching.

Jas has her head stuck in a nature magazine so doesn't care about the tragic sight in front of her bestie pallies eyes.

Baby J, why did you have to give me this family and friend?

_**10 minutes later**_

Erlack.

They are still erlacking me out.

So I being the vair clever person I am nicked vati's wallet so I could go get myself a drink.

Sometimes being this smart pays off.

_**10 seconds later**_

As I was walking along the edge of the pool, someone grabbed my waist from behind and jumped in the pool.

With me.

So my hair is now soaked.

Fabby.

Not.

Who was the fule of the first water who did this?

_**10 seconds later**_

The fule of the first water is…

I'l give you 3 clues.

He's got a camel, talks about pants and is a laugh.

If you haven't guessed; It was Dave the Laugh.

He got to the surface of the water quicker than me so saw me spluttering when I came up.

So of course being the vair mature person he is had a laughing spaz.

I just glared at him.

He stopped laughing like a loon and said:

"Sorry Kittykat, I couldn't resist. When you hear the call of the Pants, you have to answer."

"What are you on about?"

"Don't worry you little brain. I have to say Kittykat, you look vair gorgey in the water."

"What? I must look awful, my hair is all wet."

"Don't be such a Drama Queen, you're the Queen of Knickers."

"I'm not a drama queen."

"Yes, you are."

I decided I would be the vair mature one, so I splashed him.

Then he splashed me.

And then we had the Marvy Splashing War.

_**10 minutes later**_

Hahaha!

Kittykat strikes again!

I, using my never ending supply of cleverosity; dunked Dave.

Then swam away so he couldn't get me.

Muhahaha I am le genius.

_**1 minute later**_

Dave has been under for ages.

Hmm I hope the Pantsmeister isn't planning anything.

_**1 minute **_

Dave just scared the pants out of me!

He swam up behind me and pulled me down.

I'm guessing that is my karma.

Stupid karma.

Who invented it?

Whoever it was, was a loon.

Of course Dave being the vair silly person he is, picked me up and then chucked me back in the water.

Again.

Jeez. Does he have an obsession with ruining my hair?

Honestly how am I supposed to be a Sex Kitty with wet hair?

Wet hair is not vair attractive.

_**1 minute later**_

Well it must be for Dave because he snogged me.

Yummy scrumboes!

No brain.

This is supposed to be an Over Seas Snog Fest with Masimo.

Not Dave.

_**1 minute later**_

Oh well.

What an Italian Stallion doesn't know won't hurt him.

And there will be chance for that when me and Jas drive to see Masimo.

Even though we can't drive.

And we don't know the way.

But that won't stop us.

Because we are just fabby like that.

_**10 minutes later**_

Mutti finally noticed I wasn't sunbathing anymore.

She called me and said we had to go get ready.

Dave the Laugh just grinned at me and said:

"Au revoir Kittykat. Don't let your pants drop though, the Pantsmeister will be back!"

_**1 hour later**_

Ohmygiddygod!

Two vair seriously tragic things:

Number 1: We are going to some hotel called Gaylords. Enough said really.

Number 2: I have major sunburn.

Ouch.

Ouch.

OUCH.

Every time I move I hurt.

I got sun burnt all over.

And this hotel is western themed, which makes it hurt more.

Our Lord Sandra, why do you do this to me?

_**Half an hour later**_

I'm in aggers.

From sunburn and this place we are at.

It was so much worse than I imagined.

Canyons, waterfalls and everyone dressed up in cowboy outfits.

Well.. except the girls of course.

They are wearing cowgirl stuff i.e. shorts, checked shirt and high heels.

Quite a fabby look actually.

Vair shocking.

And the hotel actually sells overalls.

No joke.

Tragic or what?

_**1 minute later**_

I have just found something more tragic.

In the bar area they have bucking broncos as bar stools.

_**1 minute later**_

Marvy.

Dave's here.

Sitting on a bucking bronco.

He saw me and had a laughing spaz.

I trying to be vair mature ignored him and went and sat down.

But because Baby J lurves me so much, as soon as I sat down "Rawhide" came onto the loudspeaker and told everyone the stools were about to start bucking.

And of course I didn't get off in time and it started bucking.

And even more fabby… I fell off.

Dave was still having a laughing spaz even though he had fell of too.

Right on top of me so he was squishing my nungas.

Greaaaaaaaaaaat.

_**A/n Okay that was definitely not my best. I had serious writers block for this but I hoped you liked it anyway. I'l try to update soon, I'm now only working on three stories not including the joint one on mine and Earth Kid Tree Hugger's joint account: Dave the Laugh is GROOVY-GRAVY so updates may get quicker… but I might be starting a new story so they may get slower. Oh and please don't kill me for any grammer and spelling mistakes, I have proof read twice and spelled check but I always miss stuff. **_

_**Lurrvee you all! In a non lezzie way of course :D**_


	4. Authors Note

_**A u t h o r s N o t e**_

Okay. So some of you may be wondering what the hell has happened to me; why haven't I updated any of my stories.

I haven't even wrote my next chapter for mine and Earth Kid Tree Hugger's joint story: Sex Kitty, I Luurrvee You!.

So here's the deal: I was on holiday for 10 days and I forgot to tell you. How stupid was that? Vair stupid.

So I won't start writing anything until tomorrow as I am too tired at the moment, but there should be an update for nearly all my stories by

....... The end of the weeek. It's not a promise though

Tatty bye!


	5. Spotlight of Lurve

_**A/N: Once again I'm sorry for the long wait. I got back from my holiday a few weeks ago and have only just finished catch up work from school :| Also I have been ill the last two days when I was planning to write this. Anyway I'm not having any ideas for this chapter so I am going to let my fingers type for me. Btw the bits in bold are Georgia's brain talking to her.**_

_**The song in this is: 6 months by Hey Monday.**_

_**1 minute later**_

Still laying on the floor.

Being squashed by a nincompoop.

Or more formally known as Dave the Laugh.

Who is sitting on my nunga-nungas.

So I can barely breathe.

Lord Sandra, why do you still hate me?

_**10 seconds later**_

How long does it take someone to have a laughing spaz?

Vair long for Dave.

I think I'm going to die.

_**10 seconds later**_

Muhahaha.

Pushed Dave off me.

And he fell hard onto the floor.

That's his karma for nearly killing me.

Serves the silly pants right.

_**1 minute later**_

I finally got up and sat back on my "stool"

Ouch, ouch and ouch.

This sunburn is ouch central.

_**10 seconds later**_

Oh great.

Dave's got back on his stool and is staring at me.

Stop staring at me you staring fule!

"What?"

"You look like a tomato, it's fascinating."

"Oh marvy."

"Tis Kittykat."

"Sure."

"Trust the pants Kittykat."

Boys are such mystery.

Then he said:

"This place is far too western for an eastern chap like me. You wanna go somewhere else?"

Thankyou! Yes, yes, yes and yes!

"Yes, yes and thrice yes!"

"Marv."

So we slowly and expertly crept away from our loon mutti and vatis.

Well to be honest It wasn't that hard as they were wearing overalls and talking "country" to each other.

_**1 minute later**_

Something vair important just popped into my head.

"Dave…where are we actually going to go?"

"I don't know. I'll let the pants show us the way."

God help us.

_**Half an hour later**_

After Dave riding on his camel for a gazillion years we finally went into this bar/restaurant kind of place.

Oh deary god.

This place looks almost as bad as Gaylords.

It has the saloon doors, pictures of elvis etc.

Is this whole town gone crackers?

I think the answer you are looking for is yes.

_**10 minutes later**_

Me and Dave sat down at one of the tables when Cindeeeee the waitress came up and said:

"Howdy y'al"

"Howdy" we both said.

Then she randomly squealed and said:

"Well aint that the cutest lil' accent I ever heard. Where are you from sweetie?"

She wasn't talking to me though. She was talking to Dave.

What sort of loon calls someone they just met sweetie?

"England"

"I just love English boys."

Candeeee said trying sticky eyes on Dave.

How dare she?

Dave is mine!

_**1 second later**_

Hold your pants.

Did I just say Dave is mine?

No no no brain! Masimo is mine.

**Then why are you so jealous of this girl?**

Because Dave is a tip top pallie.

**Sure.**

Oh shut up brain.

_**1 second later**_

"Yeah English boys are great Candee. We would like two coca colas thanks, now can you give me and my boyfriend a bit of privacy?"

Merde! Why did I say he was my boyfriend?

"Oh sure Ma'am my mistake."

Dave just stared at me after she went.

Then smirked.

Here he goes….

"I knew it! You were jealous of her flirting with me!"

"Was not."

"Was too."

"Then why did you say I was your boyfriend huh?

"Err… to get her to go away. Did you see her fringe? She's like another Jas."

"Jas is your best mate."

"So?"

"Just admit Kittykat, you were jealous."

"You're mad."

"NO you're mad.

"NO, YOU'RE mad!"

"NO, YOU'RE MAD!"

"NO, YOU'RE MAD!!"

Then he snogged me.

Yummy scrumboes.

_**10 minutes later**_

Dave stopped snogging.

No stop snogging!

Then I realised that everyone was staring at us.

I blushed, but because I was so red already it made it look worse.

Great.

Why are they all staring?

Do they not snog in Hamburger-a-go-go?

_**1 minute later**_

After a gazillion years of the stare-athon, the waitress finally told us that we had been the couple in the "Spotlight of Love" so we had to slow dance in front of everyone.

Oh.

Great.

Dave was all for it though.

He dragged me to the dance floor.

What isit with him and the dragging fandango?

_**1 minute later**_

Erm… slow dancing with Dave the Laugh is well… nice.

He is so comfy.

Also my knees are trembling a bit.

I hope Dave doesn't notice or he will start his jealous theory again.

Me, jealous? I laugh at the thought.

Hahahahahahahahahahahaha.

I think I've gone hysterical.

_**10 seconds later**_

Bit of a weird song to slow dance to but I like it.

The song is:

_You're the direction I follow to get home_

_When I feel like I can't go on, you tell me to go_

_And it's like I can't feel a thing without you around_

_And don't mind me if I get weak in the knees_

_'cause you have that effect on me, you do._

(Georgia's thoughts) Whoa that's freaky. My knees are like that now. But that doesn't mean I lurrve Dave. Right?

_Everything you say_

_Everytime we kiss, I can't think straight._

(Normal font is Georgia's thoughts)

This is so freaky because every time me and Dave snog I get stupid brain…which is the same thing as in the song.

_But I'm okay_

_And I can't think of anybody else_

_Who I hate to miss as much as I hate missing you_

_Months going strong now, and no goodbye_

_Unconditional, unoriginal_

_Always by my side_

_Meant to be together_

_Meant for no one but each other_

_You love me, I love you harder so_

(Dave's thoughts) If Georgia lurvved me back, this line would be true)

_Everything you say_

_Everytime we kiss, I can't think straight_

_But I'm okay_

_And I can't think of anybody else_

_Who I hate to miss as much as I hate missing you_

_So please, give me your hands_

_So please, give me a lesson on how to steal, steal the heart_

_As fast as you stole mine, as you stole mine_

(Dave's thoughts) Oh my pants! This is so true. She stole my heart, I wish I could steal hers somehow and not Masimo. Bloody Italian Homosexual.

_Oh and everything you say_

_Everytime we kiss, I can't think straight_

_But I'm okay_

_And I can't think of anybody else_

_Who I hate to miss as much as I hate missing you_

_So please, give me your hands_

_So please, just take my hand. _

_**1 minute later**_

The song is over but me and Dave are still dancing.

But so is everyone so no-one noticed us thank god.

Another embarrassing moment would of made me even redder than a tomato.

Dave just stared at me.

So I stared back.

_**10 minutes later**_

Still having a staring fandango with Dave.

His eyes are actually vair gorgey.

I never noticed before.

I almost got lost in them.

Then Dave leaned in.

I thought he was going to snog me.

But he whispered into my ear: " I love you Kittykat."

Then walked away, and out of the restaurant.

Merde.

_**Walking back to Gaylords (Hahaha).**_

Dave said he luurrved me.

Does he really?

I can't believe he said that.

**It's not like you didn't know he lurved you.**

Shh brain. Of course I didn't know he lurved me.

Plus he's got his so called girlfriend Rachael.

So how can he lurve me?

Dave, why do you always leave me so confuzzled?

_**Gaylords Bar**_

Huh.

Typico.

My so called family didn't even notice I had gone.

Too interested in the bucking bronchos.

Not even my best pallie had noticied.

She had been too busy reading her nature magazine.

I say this with my lurveeosity for her: she is sad.

_**10 minutes later**_

Vati finally noticed his eldest daughter i.e. me.

How you couldn't notice me with my tomato skin is beyond me.

Anyway he said, twirling his badger on his chin:

"Georgia, the car convention has been moved to Manhattan so the convention have paid for us to stay in another Manhattan hotel. So when we get back to the hotel, you need to pack and tidy your room missy. No excuses about needing your beauty sleep or the other crap you come out with."

* * *

_**A/N: Well that was a bit longer than I expected. I hope you enjoyed it, review please! I can't promise a date for the next chapter but it should be soon. :)**_


	6. You Have Owls

_**a/n: I seem to always be apologising for my late updates in these authors notes, I'm really sorry for the long wait, I have so much coursework at the moment, I'm hardly sleeping, I've been doing a lot with friends and having emotional realisations but anyway the point is that I barely have time to think about updating. Anyway I hope you like this chapter :)**_

* * *

_**1 second later**_

Oh my god.

Did vati actually say what I think he just said?

Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god!

I'm going to be in the same city as Masimo!

The over sea snog fest will commence!

_**1 minute later**_

Although Dave just said he lurved me.

I still can't believe he said that.

He's going out with Rachael so he can't lurve me…can he?

He was probably just joking.

He is after all Dave the Laugh who loves a laugh.

It's going to be tres awkward between us.

Merde.

Especially if I meet Masimo; who is nearly my horn partner.

Who Dave also hates.

Fabby.

Baby J, why do you hate me?

_**12:00am **_

The elderly unstable finally got us back to the hotel.

I would say they got us back safely but vati and Uncle Eddie are wearing overalls and there is nothing safe about them.

They really do think they are cowboys.

Great, now vati will make us go western.

Fab.

_**12:05am**_

Jas has finally got her head out of her nature magazine and asked what was wrong with me as a good pallie should.

Well, out of dignity and to show her I will not be second best to a nature magazine, I will go on a protest of silence and then she will wish she paid attention earlier.

Muhahaha!

_**1 second later**_

Then I accidentally blurted it out to her.

Damn you lips!

Jas did her goldfish expression which is not attractive.

_**Gazillion years later **_

After bloody ages, Jas finally spoke.

"Oh Georgia, you're so horrible to Dave, leading him on like you do."

WHAT?

I can't believe she just said that.

She is not a proper pallie.

"I'm not horrible to Dave and I don't lead him on."

"You do. You and him flirt all the time, you let him snog you then ask him for advice on Masimo. How do you think Dave feels when you do that? He loves you Georgia"

Oh my god! My bestie pallie actually sounds sensible.

"He starts it!"

"You're so childish Gee."

"You have owls."

That's the best response you could come up with brain?

**Yep!**

Marvy.

"Whatever Gee, but if you want my opinion on it all, he definitely loves you so it's up to you what you do about it"

And she fringed off to bed.

Well she was a great help.

Not.

I don't lead Dave on… do I?

We are just tip top pallies with snogging benefits.

Besides I have Masimo.

I wonder what he's up to.

Probably sleeping as its past midnight, and Lurve Gods need their beauty sleep.

_**10 minutes later**_

Stupid Jas!

She's made me all confuzzled…

.. Now I will never be able to get to sleep…zzzzzzzzzzz.

_**9:00am**_

Why do my family insist on getting up at the crack of dawn on holiday?

Is their whole existence to annoy me?

Haha silly question brain…

..Of course they were.

Anyway before you so rudely interrupted brain, I was going to say: to make it worse vati and mutti burst in my room and went ape shit at me.

"GEORGIA! Get the hell up you lazy mare! We have a flight to catch in 4 hours!"

So why get me up at the crack of dawn?

Am I the only one with brains in this family?

_**1 minute later**_

The answer to that is yes.

An example of why is that Libby just got her head stuck in the toilet.

How? I don't know and I'm not sure I want to know the reason.

Not this early in the morning anyway.

_**11:00 am**_

The airport sadists (security guards) finally stopped having a nose in our stuff and let us through to departures.

Another hour or more with my loon family.

Great.

On the plus side there are shops and its all part of the sacrifice to get to the Lurve God

I wonder if he knows we will be in the same city?

_**1 minute later**_

If he doesn't he will know as soon as we land.

My family are so loud and embarrassing.

It's hard being the only normal one.

_**Taking off on the plane**_

Ho hum pigs bum.

Does Mutti have to scream when we take off?

It's bad enough I had forgotten my "no curlers in when taking off" rule now I'm deaf which will make me even more of a loon in front of the Lurve God.

Ouchy ouch.

_**1 hour later**_

Hmm I think I might go check what my hair looks like in the mirror.

I wonder where Dave the Laugh is?

No brain! No thinking of Dave when we are on the way to see the Lurve God.

_**1 minute later**_

Speak of the devil here is he.

In the girls toilet.

Snogging another girl.

* * *

_**A/N: Wow I honestly didn't know I was going to end it like that. Oh wells I hope you liked it, even though it defo wasn't my best chapter but I really wanted to give you an update. Sorry for the slowness of the updates, I'm so busy at the moment and have a serious case of writers block, that has lasted over a month. Anyway I'll shut up now, so please review :')**_


	7. What's up doc?

_**A/N: Put down the pitchforks, put out your flames because I am back with another update…Finally. Okay I know I am taking ages with every update but in the spirit of Christmas you can forgive me right? If not here are some reasons to soften you up: I've had 5 essays to write in two weeks, I have had loads of other coursework, I've been out with friends, it's Christmas so I have been trying to find prezzies for my friends and family, then my dog went and chewed one of the presents I was supposed to be giving to my friend tomorrow anyway sorry for rambling on but I hope in the spiritosity of Christmas that you fabbity fab readers will forgive me! :) Merry Christmas guys, I love you all! **_

_**P.S. **__**Hannah Brandon 1234321 I am sincerely sorry if your sanity has gone as you said in your most recent review to update so you could keep your sanity on the 29**__**th **__**November. I am vair sorry, I got distracted after I read it then I was banned off the computer and lots of other stuff. Anyway I'm trying to say I do care about your sanity so a warning to all readers, there will probably be no updates before Christmas unless I suddenly have loads of times or my mind is overflowing with ideas. This is the same for all my stories except maybe the Harry Potter one I have started. **_

**_P.S.S. All the above was written yesterday and guess what? We had a snow blizzard yesterday and today when I woke up for school the snow was about 5 inches deep so school was closed! And that was supposed to be my last day, so no more school:) So I used my free time to finish this chapter for you :D_**

* * *

_**1 second later**_

OH MY GIDDY GOD!

Eyes, are you playing tricks on me you cheeky devils?

Because I can't possibly be seeing Dave the Laugh, MY Dave the Laugh snogging another girl.

_**1 second later**_

Hang on I said "my."

Dave isn't mine.

The Lurve God is…**so why did you say Dave was yours?**

One fandango at a time brain; let's face this one first.

_**1 second later**_

I can't believe Dave is snogging another girl!

I mean I know he isn't my horn partner but he said he lurved me.

He obvs don't lurve me vair muchly if he's snogging someone else.

_**1 second later**_

They still haven't noticed me.

_**1 second later**_

They finally noticed me.

They both looked at me like freaky looking things.

Then Dave grinned and said:

"Hey Gee, sorry did you want to come in here?"

Why is he so calm about it? Argh stupid Dave the Laugh.

Anyway because I'm tres cool and overflowing with maturiosity I just turned around and walked away.

This trip has started marvy.

Not.

_**10 minutes later**_

Jas keeps looking at me like a looking thing.

It''s super annoying.

She could be looking at me because I've been quiet since I sat down.

Although I don't know why that surprises her as I am tres quiet and calm all the time.

**HAHAHAHAHA! Yeah sure, good one!**

Shut up brain! Don't laugh at me you spoon.

I have enough fandangos without you being tres meanio.

**Ah Georgia, start reading the instant messages coming from your heart and one of those fandangos will be solved.**

What in the name of Slims Chin City are you on about brain?

**"…………………………………"**

Very helpful brain, thank you muchly.

**Your welcome! **

Bloody typico.

I have just arrived in Confused City and then my brain goes and confuzzles me more.

I think I may have a long stay in Confused City.

_**1 minute later**_

As revenge against Jas's staring I have nicked her Ipod and started to listen to it.

Take that owlie.

_**1 minute later**_

She didn't care and kept staring.

Ho hums pigs bum.

_**5 minutes later**_

Jas finally got bored off staring at me and went to have an intellectual talk with my mutti.

Hahahahaha! Oh I do make myself giggle. As if my mutti could have a intellectualosity conversation.

Even in times of trouble I still shine the light of funnyosity.

I am amazing.

_**1 minute later**_

Guess who sat down in Jas's empty seat.

Do you need clues?

Well I will just tell you anyway in my bid for world peace.

Dave the Laugh.

Marvy.

_**1 second later**_

I've decided to close my eyes and pretend I can't hear him because of my headphones.

Once again my intellectualosity saves the day!

_**1 minute later**_

He took them out of my ears.

Merde.

_**1 second later**_

I kept my eyes closed.

I don't know why, its my weirdo brains fault.

"What's up doc?" he said in a bunny voice.

I just ignorez-voused him.

I don't know why I am so angry at him.

_**1 minute later**_

He's poking me to see if I am awake.

Good grief.

_**1 minute later**_

Something wet just went into my ear.

"Erlack" I screamed as I jumped up.

Dave was sitting next to me laughing like a proverbial drain.

Great.

I glared at him but as usual that didn't stop him.

I went to lay back and close my eyes again but he said:

"Aw Kittykat! Don't go back to sleep, I'm bored."

"Hmm I didn't know snogging someone was boring" I mumbled hoping he didn't hear but of course he heard.

"What? Is this about you seeing my snog that girl? Aah come on Kittykat it was just a bit of fun snogging, nothing major."

What is up with him recently?

One minute he is all serious telling he loves me then he's snogging another girl.

What will he do next? Start yodelling Christmas songs?

I just ignored him so he carried on:

"Kittykat, we snog randomly all the time you know it doesn't mean something special."

He has just basically said that our snogs didn't mean anything!

How dare he!

I thought he "lurved" me.

"Then why did you say you lurved me?"

Merde, merde and double merde. You are so stupid lips! You weren't supposed to say that!

"I..ermm….meant it in…a…ermm…friend way."

What is that smashing noise I can hear inside myself?

I could feel tears coming on so I shut my eyes again.

He suddenly started shouting, I could tell he was vair angry.

"This is so typico of you Georgia. When you want to snog me when you still have a boyfriend, then go snog your boyfriend in front of me that's fine. But when I am having a little fun with random snogs suddenly I'm the bad guy. I'm sick off it, why are you so annoyed with me when you do it too me all the time"

Then out of the corner of my eye I saw him go off to another seat.

Oh my giddy god.

I can't believe I had a row with Dave the Laugh.

We hardly ever properly fight.

Why do I feel so sad?

And why am I crying?

_**Half an hour later**_

I'm vair exhausted.

I really need sleep but I will never be able to sleep with all this in my brain…..zzzzzzzz…

_**Georgia's Dream**_

_Why in the name of pantyhose am I in the park back home? _

_I could of sworn I was on a plane. _

_Hmm I wonder if there is anyone about._

_Suddenly Masimo appeared from one end and Dave appeared from the other._

_Merde._

_My heart lifted at the sight of Dave but drooped again at the sight of Masimo. _

_They both stopped a bit of distance from me and said at the same time:_

"_You have to choose. Me or him."_

_I ran to Dave and snogged him to an inch of his life while Masimo tripped over his handbag. _

_End of dream_

_**1 minute later**_

Oh my giddy gods pyjamas!

That dream has made me realise something.

I lurve Dave.

* * *

_**a/n: Wooo! I'm so happy this didn't take long to write, I didn't even have to think about it, it just typed itself! I didn't know it would end like that but I like it:) The bold was Georgia's Brain by the way. I hope you liked it and in the spiritosity of Christmas take the time to review it. Merry Christmas to you all and love ya lots! (in the non lezzie way of course) **_


	8. Lurve Drug

_**A/N: Thank you for the reviews:) I noticed when reading the last chapter that Dave comes across as rather meanio, there is a reason for this which you will find out. It turns out I was not busy at all today so I thought I would try to get another chapter out, also there is a little something extra in this chapter that you will hopefully like :) Two chapters in two days, I am preety proud of moi-self :-)**_

* * *

_**1 minute later**_

Oh my god.

I lurve Dave?

**Yes.**

Be quiet please brain.

**No.**

Typical.

**Georgia lurves Dave, Georgia Lurves Dave, Georgia Lurves Dav-**

Brain?

**Yes?**

Shut up.

_**1 minute later**_

This is just marvy. Just when I am very nearly in the Nightclub of Lurve with the Italian Stallion, Dave the Tart pops up on the menu of life.

Do I actually lurve the Italian Stallion?

Well he is gorgey porgey with groovy eyes, great snogger and he is Italian. But he can barely speak English, has maybe snogged Wet Lindsay (erlack!) and I never see him.

Dave is gorgey, a tip top snogger, a laugh of course, is more a loon than moi, laughs at my loonosity, I can talk really easy with him-** This list could go on forever. Just accept it please. **

Accept what? **That you love Dave. **

I love Dave. **Yes, yes and thrice yes! **

It sounds nice. **Aww thank you! **

Not you. I love Dave sounds nice you fule.

_**10 minutes later**_

I definitely lurve Dave.

Great. Now I have a tart and Italian cakey.

What should I do about the Italian cakey?

As usual I will be the last to know.

_**1 minute later**_

I wonder where Dave is?

Oh god I hope I don't become an Ellen and stalk him. And stutter.

What in the name of pantyhose am I gonna do about Ellen if me and Dave exchanged troths?

Baby J, you are so thoughtful putting me in this fandango as I am sure it's all for some greater good or to teach me something.

**Are you mental?**

Yes.

_**10 minutes later**_

I have just remember one important thing.

I lurve Dave but Dave now hates me.

Great, I am once again on the rack of Lurve. Why does Baby J have to constantly put me back on the rack instead of selling me to some gorgey person?

Maybe he has put me on the rack so many times to try and squash my nose to make it smaller for me.

Ah I knew he cared. Although it doesn't seem to be working Baby J, so will you please give up and just let me rave happily with Dave in the Nightclub of Lurve? I will personally make sure I attempt to rescue you from Libby if you do, which is a fair payment as Libby is rather violent.

I know Baby J will listen as he is a generous person.

If not I will go back to Buddha, and hope he sees my devotion to Buddhism and help me out.

I think I am going hysterical. Here comes the waterworks; what took you so long?

_**10 minutes later**_

Still crying, my supposed bestie Jas doesn't care as she is talking to my vati about the rock crap that was in New Zealand when he went.

Blah blah ramble drivel blah. Who cares about that other then Jas? She is such a lax pallie, I think its time for a new one. One that would actually comfort her bestie pallie in her time of need.

Does no-one care about me?

_**10 minutes later**_

My loving family- Hahahaha oh how I make myself laugh- has buggered off to annoy the captain with their crappiness instead of everybody around them.

Everybody cheered when they went.

I nearly joined in with them, but I am too burned by the oven of lurve.

_**1 minute later**_

Dave the Laugh is walking near my aisle.

God, now I've got jelloid knickers.

What does it matter anyway he will probably walk straight past me as he is in his huffmobile.

_**1 minute later**_

I was wrong. He came and sat next to me and looked at me. Great. No doubt my eyes were swollen and red from crying. His expression soften and he hugged me. It felt so fabby to be in his arms. He stroked my hair and said:

"Oh dear Kittykat, we always seem to get ourselves in a pickle. I'm sorry Kittykat, I didn't mean to get so angry with you, I was just a bit annoyed."

I looked up at him and smiled.

"Its okay, you were right. I am a twit of the first water. But do our snogs really mean nothing to you?"

"Of course not Kittykat! I was just angry and being a silly duckie. I like you Kittykat, and always will."

Aaw he is so sweet.

"Did you really mean it when you said you lurved me?"

Aaaw he looks so cute when he blushes.

"Of course, Jack le Biscuit never lies." I just raised my eyebrows at him. He did a dramatic look of shock.

"Kittykat, I am shocked that you would think that I would lie, a Biscuit never says porkies."

"Why do biscuits hate the word porkies?" I said sarcastically.

"I thought you would understand."

What in the name of pantyhose's panties is he on about? As usual I will probably be the last to know.

I just laughed, accidentally doing ad hoc, nose flowing free and wild laughing. Greaaaaaaaaaat.

"Seriously though Kittykat, I do lurvvee you. I know you nearly have the Italian Handbag so you won't feel the same about me an-"

I cut him off with a snog. Muhahahah!

_**10 minutes later**_

We finally stopped snogging so we could breathe which is unfortunately necessary for survival. Boo.

Dave looked at me like a looking thing then said:

"You really have to learn to rein in your horn Gee, I mean I know it's hard with a gorgeous creature like me around but some find redbottomosity tarty."

"Are you calling me a tart?"

"Yes."

"Ch-ch-charming. And I was going to tell you that I lurved you and am going to tell Masimo where to stick it, but oh well."

And I walked off.

_**a/n: ah ha! You thought I was done didn't you? Oh no international chums, I decided to have the fabby Dave's POV of this chapter in here too, this is the extra I was talking about in the top authors note :) so scroll down and read on my fabby readers :D**_

_**Daves POV**_

Well what a day this has been.

First I have mutti and vati screaming at me at the crack of dawn (9:00am) while in hideous night wear that may turn me into a schizophrenic wreck in years to come, which would wreck my career of being a stand up comedian.

Then I get screamed at by an airport worker that looked like Hitler for doing my fabby moon walking through the security beeper thingy and crashing onto that moving thing that the nosy airport sadists use to have a mooch at the insides of our bags. To top that one off Vati went ballisticimus at me while Mutti just tutted. What is it with grown ups (hahaha I can't believe my olds are considered as adults) and tutting? What is the point of it? To annoy us young groovers? Probably.

Then I get on the plane, and an hour later when I am just about to have a zizz some girl starts harassing me. Don't get me wrong she was fit, but she was rather annoying and fake.

Like that Wet Lindsay that went to Gee's school. She just kept talking to me, not even getting the message when I closed my eyes.

I was thinking about Gee, and suddenly decided to make the most with this annoying girl and make Gee jealous by snogging her. Gee walked in on us snogging and walked off.

So later on I went to talk to her to see if I had made her jealous but she seemed pissed off, and I had a spaz at her for being a hypocrite so now she probably hates me.

Thanks Buddha, I ask you for an easier life and I get the girl I lurve hating me. You must truely care.

**_Half an hour later_**

Decided to go for a quick walk-a-roonie with my camel, Cammie.

She is the Lurve Camel, and is rather confused as I am going out with Rachael but I lurve Gee.

Well know she knows how I feel constantly. Rachael's a great girl and everything, but I lurve her like a matey type mate and her hair does get rather annoying as it is ginger and that says it all. _(a/n no offence to ginger people, this is just the type of thing dave would say, so please don't take offence)_

With Gee it's totally different, I think about her all the time, when I hear or think something funny I instantly want to tell her, when I think or hear something rudey dudey I hear her say "oo-er!" in my head, in fact I hear her a lot of times in my head, when I see her I always go funny and can't resist talking to her and get an overwhelming urge to snog her, when she walks away I want to pull her back. She is like my obession like a Lurve Drug or something.

**_1 minute later_**

Oh merde. I am about to walk past Gee's aisle, and she probably hates me.

As I got to her aisle I couldn't help but look at her.

Oh my biscuits! She's crying. Did I do this to her? Aaw man now I feel really guilty.

I sat down next to her and looked at her. Her eyes were puffy from crying, her eyes were full of sadosity.

Oh god.

"Oh dear Kittykat, we always seem to get ourselves in a pickle. I'm sorry Kittykat, I didn't mean to get so angry with you, I was just a bit annoyed."

She looked up at me and smiled. Ooh she is so gorgey, does she know what she does to me? I'm glad she smiled though as that should mean she's not angry at me. Werhay! The biscuit is back in the Lurve Game.

"Its okay, you were right. I am a twit of the first water. But do our snogs really mean nothing to you?"

She looked really hurt when she said the last bit. I must of gone quackers to say that our snogs mean nothing because they certainly mean something, boy she is such an amazing snogger and I feel hysterical with lurve when we snog.

"Of course not Kittykat! I was just angry and being a silly duckie. I like you Kittykat, and always will."

Why do I have to be so honest? That must of made her feel vair akward. Great, I hope this doesn't make her want to go to that lesbian Handbag Horse even more.

"Did you really mean it when you said you lurved me?"

Oh marv. I'm blushing. How embarrassing and girly. I must use more of my laugh talents to de-embarrass my gorgeous self.

"Of course, Jack le Biscuit never lies." She raised her eyebrows me, as if she didn't believe me. How could she think that? I did a mock shocked expression.

"Kittykat, I am shocked that you would think that I would lie, a Biscuit never says porkies."

"Why do biscuits hate the word porkies?" She said sarcastically.

"I thought you would understand."

She just laughed.

"Seriously though Kittykat, I do lurvvee you. I know you nearly have the Italian Handbag so you won't feel the same about me an-"

And she cut me off with a snog! Result! And I didn't even have to do tickly bears! Oh yes, Dave le Laugh is an irresistable sexy biscuit.

_**10 minutes later**_

She finally pulled away so we could breathe. Ahh no fun, it would have been utterly scrumptious to die by snogging. I was more than happy to go to the Biscuit Tin in the sky if we could of snogged for longer.

Is this just her redbottomosity again? Great. She's probably just releasing her snogging withdrawal. But then again I got a good snog out of it, so all is fair in love and PANTS. For now anyway.

"You really have to learn to rein in your horn Gee, I mean I know it's hard with a gorgeous creature like me around but some find redbottomosity tarty."

"Are you calling me a tart?"

"Yes."

"Ch-ch-charming. And I was going to tell you that I lurved you and am going to tell Masimo where to stick it, but oh well."

And she walked off.

**_1 minute later_**

Wait a minute!

Did she just say she loved me?

YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSS!

* * *

**_a/n: Phew I am done! I didn't know it would end up with Georgia telling him she lurrveeed him but its fun finding out along the way. I know it sounds weird but my fingers just type it by themselves I barely think about what I am typing. Well this is actually one of my favourite chapters to have wrote, I hope you enjoyed it. I can't give a date for the next update, it could be before christmas or I could take ages, I never know so be patient with me :) And as I have made an effort to get you ANOTHER update BEFORE Christmas when I said I wouldn't be able to, can you please spare some time to review this out of lurve for this story, the spiritosity of Christmas, my efforts to get this chapter up or whatever. Reviews would be a marvy early Christmas present :) I love you all and merry christmas :D_**


	9. Emotional Whatsits

**A/N: I am going to have extreme difficulty updating for a while because my computer has a huge virus so I can't use it and my laptop is not working either so I'll have to sneakily use my mums or my two sisters until I (hopefully) get a new laptop in April for my birthday. So my point is I can't promise dates on updates, I'm on half term now so I will try to update all my stories, but I can't promise anything. Sorry for the long wait on this things are still crazy around here, anyway I hope you like this.**

* * *

**Emotional Whatsits.**

**_1 minute later_**

Oh my god.

What is wrong with me? Why did I walk off?

I am such a div.

God, please do not let me turn into Jas.

**_1 minute later_**

I bet Jas will call me a tart when I tell her about my Dave the Laugh epiphany whatist.

I am not a tart.

Am I?

Oh god, maybe I am.

Even Dave called me a tart.

Okay I will do what good old Baby J would do; show a high level of sophis.

And no more snogging in public.

I will gird my loins.

My loins will be gird-ed

Hahaha? Get it? Gird-ed! Like guarded!

I think I have become hysterical.

**_1 minute later_**

My loins are ungirded.

They are gird less.

Oo-er.

Shut up brain!

**_30 seconds later_**

It wasn't my fault.

To clear all suspiciouosity in the air, I will tell you what happened.

Dave the Laugh came running up to me like a mad fool, which he is.

Then he grinned at me, and my legs went entirely jelloid, then he picked me up and span me around.

Now bear in my mind, that we were on an aeroplane and that the aisles on aeroplanes are tiny, so when Dave did that it was absoloute aggers.

My knees and legs took a beating from the chairs.

Then he finally stopped spinning me a round like a fool, and snogged me.

So my little pals, as you can know clearly see, Dave ungirded my loins.

Oo-er!

**_10 minutes later_**

He really is a tip top snogger.

And a lip nibbler extraordinaire.

Wow woza wow!

Dave the Laugh can neck snog.

Vair well by the way.

**_1 minute later_**

The air hostess had a nervy b at us for blocking the aisle.

Well actually she had a nervy b at me.

She was trying sticky eyes with Dave.

I will have to kill her.

Of course Dave used his charm to shut her up.

By charm I mean he winked at her and she practically feinted so we used that as our escape.

As we sat back in our seats, well I say our he was in my nature loving best pallies seat but he claimed it as his.

Anyway before I rudely interrupted my self, when we sat down I said to Dave: "The air hostess lurveees you."

"Who doesn't?"

"You are vair big headed Dave."

"I'm not bigheaded, it's true. Besides which of us has a fan club?"

He has actually got a point, sadly.

The ginger twitches are active members of the Dave the Laugh fan club, along with those girls at party who follow him around like dogs.

"I'll take you silence as an agreement. So are you know part of my fan club Kittykat?"

"Nope."

"But you lurve me don't you?" Aww. His pout is adorable.

"You love that I love you don't you?"

"Ha. You admitted it again! I always knew you did you silly fraulein."

Damn. He had me there.

Ah well live and let lie or whatever it is.

"Okay so I said I love you, so....are...we..erm..you...know?"

Great. I've turned into Ellen.

"Kindly remove Ellen's voice box would you?"

"Are we...horn partners now?"

That was so embarrassing. Dave grinned.

Mmm yummy scrumboes.

"I would love to be Kittykat, but you have got to try harder than that."

What in the name of Vati's smalls he is talking about?

Erlack, now I have Vati's undercrackers in my head.

Get out, get out, get out!

"You need to ask me to be your horn partner first you silly fraulein."

He has well and truely cracked.

I think he must of banged his head when he sat down.

"What?"

"Ask me Kittykat. It's very simple."

"You want me to ask you?"

"Yes."

"No!"

"Why?"

"Because. Why should I ask you out, isn't that the boys job."

"Ah but that rule has an exception." Dave said while nodding his head in a way that he thought was wise. It wasn't.

"What is the exception?" He looked at me like I was dim. Boys are such a mystery.

"Ah don't you see Kittykat? I have told you I lurved you for a long time, but you where always too busy fancying Italian lesbians and wombats and such."

"What in the name of PANTS are you talking about?"

"I have done loads of embarrassing emotional whatsits, so now it's your time. Plus it's a real ego buffer to have the girl ask you."

I just looked at him. He stared innocently back, which slightly made my lips pucker up.

"Do I really have to?"

"Yes. You can forfeit on it but there would be no snoggsies."

Damn him.

"Fine. Dave/Hornmesiter/King of Pants/ The Vati, would you be my hornpartner."

"I dont know Kittykat, the Hornmeister is in high demand you know..." I gave him my most evilest evils.

He grinned and said: "Of course I would missus. Now give me a snog, to make it official."

This horn partner stuff is guht!

**_10 minutes later_**

Yes! I am now the Official Girlfriend of the Laugh God!

The Laugh God?! Where did that come from?

It fits though. Hmmm. Laugh God. It sounds good.

Gee, The Girlfriend Of The Laugh God.

Now that sounds fabby.

And if being the girlfriend means laughs and snogs then double fabby.

**_10 minutes later_**

Oh joy unbound! My best pallie has come over, and is staring at me.

I stopped snogging, laughing when Dave protested and said to Jas:

"Stop staring at me you lezzie."

Jas got all humpy with me as I expected but she didn't fringe off like I wouldn't her too.

"You're such a tart Georgia. You need to control your redbottomosity or Masimo will never want to go out with you."

"That doesn't matter."

"Whaa...huh?" Jas's goldfish expression is not the most attractive she has looked. But I am a good pally so I didn't mention this.

"I'm going out with Dave silly."

Jas just did that looking at me, looking at Dave thing.

Dave looked down and rasied his eyebrow at me, so I just nodded wisely.

"Aaaaaaaaaaaah!"

What fresh hell!

Jas is squealing. Actually squealing. I think she may have lost it.

She pulled us both into a hug. Dave looked a touch scared. I can't blame him.

I said lovingly to her: "Let go of us you lezzie."

She actually listened to me for once then said:

"Sorry. I'm just happy she has finally admitted she loved you, and stopped having redbottomosity."

She's such a charmer. But thankfully she fringed off, probably to talk to my vati about exploding bores and badger holes.

**_Half an hour later_**

Dave was still affected by Jas's unusually-unusual behaviour. Or so he says.

"You know missus, you could help your gorgeous boyfriend by snogging. It's very therapeutic."

Amazingly he is right, it's very good for health.

It should be part of the p.e fitness regime.

Actually no it shouldn't be, because I go to an all girls school so we would be lezzies.

I bet Miss Stamp would love that.

Erlack, get out of my head!

**_10 minutes later_**

Dave looked like he was thinking.

Phwoar! He looks scrummy.

I must not get stupid brain. Dave will never let me hear the end of it.

"What are you thinking about Hornmeister?"

"Well we said we where going to introduce the Hamburgese to the fab world of Pants and Knickers, but we have been slack on that duty. "

"Indeedy. What do you suggest we do Pants King?"

"You shall see." He said grinning. Mmm he really" is gorgey. How did I not notice before?

What is he planning?

I will be the last to know.

**_Touchdown_**

Have you ever snogged while on a plane that is landing?

It is painful.

When we hit the ground, it made me and Dave jump and bang our heads.

Although my head was better when Dave kissed it.

**_Hamburger a go go airport security_**

Woo! We are no longer in a hoedown, but in the city of fashion gods.

Well except from the hideous airport staff uniforms.

I feel sorry for them having to work in a boring place like this all day in a crappy outfit.

As Dave has told me numerous times: I am all heart.

When I told Jas of my sympathy for the airport workers she just tutted at me.

What is the fascination with tutting?

The sadists at school, Elvis, Mutti, Vati and now Jas all tut at me.

Why?

**_10 minutes later_**

Dave just said "Howdy!" to the airport sadist that mooches at passport photos and he just looked at him like he was a loon.

Admittedly Dave is a loon, but the airport sadist lives in Hamburgese so he should be full of love and say howdy back.

He must not be a true Hamburgese person.

**_10 minutes later_**

Waiting for our luggage.

Why is it taking so long?

I hope some red faced loon has not stolen my foundation.

It would be so typical of god. Although he has turned up trumps with my new troth so I will not convert to Buddhism.

Yet.

**_10 minutes later_**

My so called family are all bored too, but have different ways of dealing with it:

Uncle Eddie is practising his stripper moves.

Vati is twirling his beard and saying Elvis quotes.

Mutti is adjusting her over the shoulder bolder holder.

Libbs is playing with Pantalizer's head.

And Jas is reading a nature magazine.

How did I end up with these people?

**_20 minutes later_**

The luggage finally started coming on the moving belt thing.

The belt thing looks like it would be fun to ride.

Shame.

**_1 minute later_**

Either Dave can read my mind or he was thinking the same thing because he suddenly dragged me on it.

It was vair funny riding on someones luggage.

Of course my "parents" didn't notice.

But the airport workers did.

Merde.

**_30 minutes later_**

I can't believe I am in Airport Jail with Dave and Uncle Eddie.

Let me add something: Uncle Eddie got put in here for actually stripping, so he is only wearing his feather codpiece and his comedy undercrackers.

Marv.

* * *

**Blimey. I didn't know I would end it like that, but that's the fun of it. Yay, Dave and Gee are together! I wish I could say when the next update will be but I can't. I will try writing more tomorrow. Not much happened in this and their is probably huge grammer and spelling mistakes; I proof checked it three times but I always miss stuff. By the way it would be fabby if anyone could give me any ideas for locations in Manhattan as I've never been there so I don't know much about it. Also if anyone has any plot ideas they would like to share that would be cool, I think I know where I'm going to take this but ideas are welcome. Reviews would be fab. I love you all :)**


	10. Flashing His Pants

_**A/n: *Slowly and very cautiously peeks her head over the wall then ducks suddenly as Rosie's horns are thrown at her head* Okay so as I seem to start all authors notes, I am tres tres tres sorry for the ridiculously long wait on this chapter but as usual I have a few excuses: We've had internet problems, I've had a lot of family, friend and emotional problems, I've had writers block, I haven't felt cheery enough to write, my teachers are killing me with work, I've been busy and I have GCSE'S in May :/**_

_**But I really hope that my wonderful readers will forgive me, and have faith in me. I should be able to write more as the coursework part of year eleven is almost done and then I will have a few half terms and after June I will be off school.**_

_**Thank you to Hannah Brandon 1234321 for her fabby ideas, some were used in this chapter, and if you look in the reviews you can see exactly what parts where hers :D. I give full credit to her for those ideas, all I did was write them; she was the fabby mind behind them :D**_

_**I hope this chapter is worthy of a review or comment in some way, so if you have anything to say about it please review :D**_

_**1 minute later**_

How do I always end up in vair bizarre fandangos like this?

One minute I am taking a completely innocent luggage ride with Dave the Laugh and the next I am in the airport jail with said Laugh and my bald as a coot Uncle Eddie who are discussing the way of the Baldy-O-Gram.

Baby J, why do you hate me?

_**1 minute later**_

It's so typical that I would get a horn partner who wants to become a stripper.

A bald one at that.

Oh the shame.

Am I the only normal person in the world?

Yes.

_**1 minute later **_

Dave looks muchos too interested about Uncle Eddie's stripping career.

I hope his troth plighting hysterics have not put him on the turn...

..or are going to turn him into a bald, fat stripper.

Erlack, I do not need that image in my head, fanks very much.

It's possibly worse than when I accidently saw Vati in his nuddy pants.

I think I'm going to give live in a forest, and become buddha so I can get both images out of my head.

_**2 minutes later**_

Ho hums pigs bum.

Uncle Eggy has now started showing Dave his moves.

His stripper moves.

And Dave is joining in.

Sacre bleu!

_**10 minutes later**_

I couldn't stand watching this strange and perverted porn any more.

So I walked over to Dave, and tried to pull him way from the strange stripper man that pretends he is my uncle, and do you know what my so called uncle did?

He grabbed Dave's other arm and started a tug of war thingy with me, you know when two people hold onto someone's arm or hand and try to drag them in different directions?

Yes, my ancient, should be mature but is severely lacking maturosity, fought me for Dave the Laugh.

And Dave the Laugh was practically wetting himself laughing.

Fule.

_**10 minutes**_

Merci, to the only smart airport staff person who realised that Uncle Eggy Head should be in a separate cell to ours for our mental health.

Well actually, she said that adults were not supposed to be in the same cell as children for some boring reason.

But I like to look at the positive.

_**1 minute later**_

The laughing idiot that is my boyfriend finally realised that he should be keeping his fabby company.

He came over and sat vair close with a cheeky grin on his gorgey face.

It slightly gave me the horn, and when I say slightly I actually mean "phwoar!"

He leaned in real close, and I thought he was going to snog but then he said:

"Did you know that Bald Strippers have to shave off all their hair on their body? Even their legs. Apparently it makes the Ladeez go crazy."

I just looked at him in disbeliefosity.

He just nodded in what he thought was a wise way.

It wasn't

"Dave, did you know that you are quite clinically insane?"

"You just don't appreciate my creativosity"

"What's creative about knowing about bald strippers?"

"What's not creative about knowing about bald stripper's Sex Kitty?"

"Are you going to become a hairless, baldy stripper?"

"I might"

Good grief.

_**1 minute later**_

Thankfully Dave has gone back to his normal self.

Well his normal self that would never become a bald stripper.

According to him, the hysterics from being in jail had gone to his head.

But that didn't stop him from being able to snog.

Yummy scrumboes

_**10 minutes later**_

Dave pulled away from the kiss and looked me in the eyes.

It was actually kind of nice.

He didn't look at me in a stalkerish type of way, but in a lurrveee kind of way.

Then he grinned cheekily and said:

"Up for some number nine later, Kittykat?"

"Do you think I am a tart?"

"Yes"

I biffed him.

"So violent Kittykat."

"You called me a tart"

"Yes but you are my tart" He said trying his puppy eyes which I had to admit where vair cute. But I am girding my loins.

I biffed him again. He pretended to cry, but I didn't un-gird my loins, even though I wasn't even angry with him.

"I lurvee you" he said softly, and I nearly melted but then I saw his cheeky grin and said with glaciosity:

"I'm afraid that won't work Mr Laugh, and in punishment for being so meanio to your fabby girlfriend, I won't snog you for the rest of the day"

Dave did his best goldfish expression.

"But Kittykat, snogs are essential to the biscuit way of life."

"You are such a tart Dave"

"Say's you! You are already puckering up at the thought of snogging this gorgey Laugh."

"No I'm not" I said even though my lips were puckering. "And you will not get your snogs Mr Laugh"

_**1 minute later**_

Yummy scrumboes! Dave really is fabby at nip libbling!

Hang on! Wasn't I supposed to be withholding snogs?

Oh well, all's fair in love and snogs.

_**20 minutes later**_

Typico. My so called parents remember that I exist and come to get me when I am in the middle of snogging Dave.

Why couldn't they have come when the Baldy-O-Gram was showing off his moves?

Oh yeah, because that would make them responsible parents, and they could never be that.

As shown with Libbs who is currently trying to poo in the corner.

Lovely.

_**10 minutes/Gazillion years later**_

After a life time of badger twirling (Vati), tutting and over the shoulder boulder houlder adjusting (Mutti) and the most boring lecture in the history of _enneyeux _lectures as the maddus french would say delieved by an even more boring airport worker, Dave, me and Uncle Egg Head were finally released from jail.

Oh sweet relief.

Oh how I missed civilization.

_**1 minute later**_

The so called civilization apparently doesn't love me.

In fact when I expressed how much I missed them, they ignored me.

Where is the lurrveee?

_**2 minutes later**_

Dave the Laugh decided that the lurvee was behind his suitcase where he snogged me to an inch of my death.

Fab.

Except that Jas keeps tutting at us which is really distracting.

_**5 minutes later**_

Jas has finally let us snog in peace.

And she even did it without a fuss, and without us asking her to.

Well actually we threw one of her owls at her.

It was for the greater good.

But of course Jazzy Spazzy did not understand, and became violent.

She pushed me and Dave over so that the whole of the Hamburgese Apple airport could see us snogging.

Then stomped off, flicking her fringe like a loon.

I was almost feeling sorry, until Dave snogged me again.

_**5 minutes later**_

We stopped snogging because Libbs was apparently fascinated by us snogging and put her face right near ours and did her tres scary smile which made us jump and knock over Dave's suitcase, which started a domino effect and all our suitcases were knocked over.

I thought it was quite coolio.

Our so called parent's didn't.

Neither did Jas who was becoming as bad as Mutti on the tutting side.

Neither did the airport workers who could give tres ugly evils

The so called civilization also didn't find it coolio.

But Dave did, and we started having a laughing spaz.

In front of the whole airport.

_**10 minutes later**_

Dave and I were "escorted" out by the so called security who were actually just freakishly tall, wide men

Who didn't find Dave trying to have a fisticuff at dawn with him

And saying that we would ride off on Dark Star or a camel.

I thought it was the height of hilariousosity.

But no-one else did.

It is hard being the only one with a sense of humour.

_**10 minutes later**_

I am personally quite proud of what I have achieved for far in Hamburgese Land:

I have rode a bucking bronco

Fallen off said bronc0

Successfully beautified on a plane

Chucked a spoon at my father and enlarged his nose

Duffed up Jas

Had my first slow dance

Argued with a Laugh

Realised I lurrvedd said Laugh

Became horn partners with Dave The Laugh

Rode a luggage conveyor thingy with him

Got put into jail

Snogged Dave...a lot

Showed Hamburgese Airport people Merry England's funosity

Got escorted out by two Hamburgese people

_**1 minute later**_

Dave and I still need to spread the word about Pants, Knickers and Vikings throughout Hamburgese.

How else will I get a parade?

Or a balloon shaped as my head?

I can't wait to meet my adoring fans.

They will lurveeee me!

And Dave.

I suppose...

But they will lurve me most

Shh don't tell Dave.

_**1 minute**_

I just told myself not to tell Dave.

I think I'm going quakers...

Either that or the Hamburgese air is making me slightly crazy

Yep that must be it.

_**1 hour later - in the Torture Vehicle which some people could sadly mistake for a car**_

I am stuck between Libs and Dave who have decided to fill the time it is taking our Vati's to get to the new hotel by having a sword fight with Mr and Mrs Fish that Mutti foolishly let Libby take on holiday.

I have been hit with Mr and Mrs Fish "accidently" vair amount of times and had learnt a few things:

1. Fish slime does not make a good moisturiser

2. Dave and Libby together were scary and could quite possibly take over the world.

Ho hums pig bums.

_**20 minutes later**_

Sweet freedom!

Well from being in the middle of a fish fight at least

There is no escape from the elderly loons, or the Toddly Loon

But you know me, I always look for the positive.

_**5 seconds later**_

Uncle Eggy just got out a fake egg and put it on his head.

Baby J, please save me.

_**In the sane-ish looking hotel**_

This hotel actually appears normal

Well as normal as an Hamburgese hotel can be

It must be the sophis-nese of Manhattan people

They could almost be classed as sane people.

Almost.

They do call trousers pants, and that is just silly.

Everyone knows only boy type people where pants.

Maybe they are all on the turn in Hamburgese Land.

Guht in Himmel.

_**Half an hour later**_

We finally got checked in, but not before a lot of badger twirling and over the shoulder boulder adjusting.

Mine and Jas's room is opposite's Dave's.

He said to keep my nungas covered at all times for my own safety because he will be ninja-ing in to our room tonight for some camel riding.

I like to think he is joking.

Or he's still got troth plighting hysterics.

_**1 hour later**_

Sweet freedom!

The elderly loons have allowed Po, Laugh and I to go into the town!

I just think they wanted some privacy to compare chin badgers and elvis quiffs.

Anyway we are going into Manhatten!

City of the sophis apple loons!

Vati even gave me some spendaroonies.

I almost hugged him.

Almost.

_**45 minutes later**_

Wowza!

For a place that's in Hamburgese Land, Manhattan is pretty amazing!

Even Dave looked impressed.

He is doing a fabby goldfish impression.

Jaz is just being jaz, i.e. going on and on about useless wildlife facts.

_**5 minutes later**_

I have just found out why Dave was doing an excellent impression of a goldfish with a hint of agogs.

He saw a costume shop.

In the window there was a super hero outfit, which had tights and pants on top of them

Dave is in lurveee with them.

So in lurve with them that he dragged his delicate girlfriend into the shop and didn't even notice when she hit her head against the door frame.

He was blinded by his lurve for pants.

Guht in himmel.

_**10 minutes later**_

In one of the most sophis and coolio places in the world, my maddus loonus boyfriend is trying on a superhero outfit.

_**1 minute later**_

Dave came out strutting, like he was on a cat walk and flashing his pants at me (oo-er!)

I couldn't help but have a laughing spaz.

Dave didn't seem to care though, he was too busy having fun as Laugh Man.

To each their own, I guess.

I'm just going to look around and pretend I wasn't just a laughing vole in a skirt.

Or that my boyfriend is wearing tights.

_**10 minutes**_

Fabby!

I have found the coolest bison horns!

They are like horns the Vikings would wear!

Ro-Ro will lurvee them.

I must get some for the Ace Gang.

_**5 minutes later**_

Dave bought a pair too

When I was with Robbie, the sex god, I would have died if he caught me buying horns (oo-er!)

But that's what I lurve about being with Dave the Laugh; I can be as much of a loon as I like because he's more of a loon than he is.

He never makes me feel like such a fule like Robbie and Masimo did.

I really do lurvee Dave.

_**1 minute later**_

I think I might have been thinking for too long because Dave gave me a klinglon salute while looking amused and said:

"You thinking about me again Kittykat?"

"Yep." I said with a huge smile, the kind where my nose spreads over my face

He looked shocked, but then recovered and gave me a cheeky grin that was yummy scrumboes and said:

"Oo-er Kittykat. Tell me more."

"I was thinking about how I love you" Stupid, stupid brain! I didn't mean to say that. I felt my face go as red as a tomato.

Dave looked shocked for a second again, and then smiled a really big, happy smile that made me go all gooey and snogged me gently. Then he said:

"I love you too Kittykat."

Then snogged me again!

What a fabby moment!

_**10 minutes later**_

Po ruined the moment as usual by dragging us out of the shop.

Then she biffed me.

Just because I threw my horns at her….at her head.

_**1 minute later**_

Jas now lurves her horns!

But she won't wear them.

I don't understand her.

_**30 minutes later**_

The Statue of Liberty…is tres boring! (A/N: Not my own opinion!)

It's just a boring woman holding a troth.

What's so special about that?

Dave actually seems interested in it though.

The Laugh Man continues to surprise me.

Jas, on the other hand, is being her usual self and is flicking her fringe while telling us useless facts about the statue.

_**1 minute later**_

Dave is now trying to look up dear O' Libertaaay's skirt

Sacre bleu!

Jas looks horrified, her fringe is bouncing because she's shaking her head at him so much

I tried tutting at him like a sophis person, but I ended up having a laughing spaz.

_**10 minutes later**_

Are me and Dave going to get kicked out of every place we go to into Hamburgese?

We've been kicked out off an aiport, put in jail and been kicked out of the statue of liberty and it hasn't even been a week yet!

Sacre bleu!

**A/N: Finally done! I know it was a weird way to end it, but I didn't want to torture you lovely people with a cliffhanger, especially if it takes me ages to update. I hope you liked it, I really enjoyed writing it but I want to know what you think. Let me know, reviews are very welcome with me :D I'm going to finalize my plan for next chapter and start writing on it tomorrow or at the weekend so hopefully you won't have to wait as long :D**


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